No Such Thing
by BoundLight
Summary: There's a murder in Santa Barbra and the CBI get called in. Terrible summary. Slight slash, Lassiter/Shawn, Jane/Cho
1. Chapter 1

Author Note: So I had this long fight with myself about one aspect of this fic: names. See, with Psych, first names, for the most part, are the way to go; I'm not going to spend the who fic calling Shawn "Spencer". But with The Mentalist, it's the opposite! If you call Rigsby "Wayne" for a minute I'm going to be like "Who the hell is….ooooh" SO! If a character is from The Mentalist, I'm using last names. Just thought I'd clear that up… although, if you are familiar with both fandoms, it should be easy as pie for you.

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Shawn and Gus entered the Santa Barbra Police Department, "Hey Lassie! Heads up!" Shawn tossed him a pineapple smoothie.

The detective scowled at the younger man before sipping at the drink. He'd never admit it, but it was pretty tasty.

The two men wandered further into the police station. "Hello Jules my dear." Shawn hopped up onto the woman's desk, casually scanning all the police reports that lay open upon it. His gaze fell on one marked heavily with red, his keen eyes picking up enough for him to make out that a young woman was murdered on the beach last night and that the police had no leads.

Juliet noticed how Shawn's eyes paused, and she quickly snapped the case file closed. "We don't need your help on this one Shawn."

"Jules, I'm offended. I can totally help!"

Gus crossed his arms and did his best to look important as he backed up his friend.

Lassiter crossed the bull pen to stand by his partner. "We don't need your help because the State has already decided that _they're_ going to help."

Shawn laughed and rolled his eyes dramatically. "Who, the FBI? We help out way more than those guys!"

"Yeah," Gus added, "Even when they're helping we're always the ones who discover who the real bad guys are! Have some faith!"

Lassiter seemed vaguely annoyed, "No, not the FBI, the _CBI_, and apparently the unit they're sending over has their _own_ psychic."

Gus looked to Shawn in obvious confusion, he leaned over to whisper, "Who're the CBI? Shawn? …Shawn??" Gus waved a hand in front of Shawn's face.

Shawn stared off in a daze "…The CBI…" he snapped his gaze to Lassiter, "You mean Patrick Jane? Patrick Jane is coming _here_??" Shawn broke into a huge grin and he jumped off the desk, grabbing Gus in his excitement, "Oh my God, we're going to meet Patrick Jane!"

Gus stared at Shawn as though he'd grown a second head. He gripped his friends arms tightly until he stilled, "Who is Patrick Jane?"

"Only the greatest psychic _ever_!"

Lassiter grumbled, and then paused, Patrick Jane…there was something very familiar about that name…

Suddenly the door was thrown open, and a very severe woman led two men into the building. They were followed slightly behind by an attractive man in a grey suit who cheerfully looked this way and that, absorbing every thing. He was briefly sidetracked by something on the wall. He leaned close to examine it, when immediately they heard the woman clear her throat. "Coming Jane?"

The man looked up and smiled widely, quickly catching up with his companions.

They moved further into the station and were abruptly stopped by the chief, who shook their hands and ushered them into her office. Vick paused before closing the door, "Lassiter! O'Hara! My office."

With a parting glance to Shawn and Gus, the two detectives entered the chiefs office, closing the door softly behind them.

Shawn and Gus shared a look and scrambled for the door, leaning in close to hear what was being said.

"Shawn!" Gus whispered fiercely, "What's going on? Who are they?"

"Dude, shut up!"

"No Shawn, tell me!"

Shawn sighed dramatically, "The CBI are the California Bureau of Investigation, and _Patrick Jane_ is just… fully awesome! Now shh!"

The two listened, and heard nothing. Confused, they shifted closer to the door.

"Oh. Hello."

The two men slowly turned towards the door, and noticed it had been opened an inch, and the grey suited man now peered out at them. They quickly scrambled to their feet.

"Oh, uh, Gus totally lost a contact over here, yeah… uh, I think we found it, right Gus?"

"Yeah, right."

"Good! So we'll be going!" Shawn grabbed Gus by the arm and they quickly turned to escape.

"Wait right there Spencer." Lassiter glared at the two guilty men.

Vick cleared her throat, "That's right Spencer, you two get in here."

"Really?" Shawn grinned at Gus and strode purposefully into the office.

"Spencer, Gus, this is Agent Lisbon, Agent Rigsby, and Agent Cho. And this is…"

Lisbon stepped forward, "Uh, our Consultant. Patrick Jane." Jane extended a hand, and Shawn quickly jumped forward to shake it.

Juliet grinned, "So it looks like we'll have two psychics helpin' out on this one."

Jane's smile faltered as he locked eyes with the young woman. "Detective, there is no such thing as psychics." He stepped back to stand between Rigsby and Cho. Shawn narrowed his eyes in thought as he watched Cho catch Jane's eye and incline his head. Jane nodded.

Lassiter seemed satisfied by this remark, and grinned broadly at Shawn. Juliet however, glared, "Shawn happens to be a _real_ psychic, and he has helped this department close countless cases."

Jane smirked and moved to stand in front of the young man, "Oh. Really?" He looked at Shawn expectantly. Shawn felt himself stand straighter, and quickly absorbed every detail he could about the man before him.

He put a hand to his head to begin his psychic vision when he was interrupted by an exasperated voice. "Jane, stop it." Lisbon grabbed Jane's arm and pulled him bodily away, she turned back to Shawn, "Sorry about him, he has _no _people skills."

There was an exaggerated gasp from behind her, "Lisbon! I wouldn't say _no_ people skills, just-"

"Jane! Lets focus on the case please?"

Jane winked at Shawn before he was elbowed by Cho. Shawn heard Cho murmur, "Did you really have to do that?" and was surprised to see Jane look a little bashful.

Gus moved quickly behind Shawn, "You actually _like_ that guy?"

"Well…I'm sure he's nicer when…he wants to be."

Vick cleared her throat and pulled out a rather thick file. She opened to the first page, and handed over a stack of photos of the victim, and began explaining what they knew. Lisbon flipped quickly through the photos and looked questioningly at the chief. "Has the body been moved?"

Vick paused, "Well…no, CSI is still going over the crime scene looking for evidence, however, as the body was found in the water, most of the biological evidence has been washed away."

"Be that as it may, we would still like to see the body."

Lassiter crossed his arms and glared at Lisbon, "Who put you in charge of this case?"

"The victim is the Governors cousin and he asked for us to lead this case, and as the ranking state officials we'll be taking point. Now. Where's the body?"


	2. Chapter 2

Authors Note: I am not from California, so any schools, businesses, houses, _anything_ are all made up. sorry.

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They were taken to a beach just south of the city. Bright yellow tape blocked off a large section, and down towards the waves there was a lot of movement as men combed the surrounding sand for clues.

Lassiter lead the group down to the shore where a young woman was lying face down. She was wearing a two piece bathing suit and Shawn noticed a slight variation in her tan around her ankle. Hmm.

Lassiter took a small notepad out from his jacket pocket, "Her name is Marisa Robinson, 19, lives on the east side of town with her mother and father, and she has a 16 year old brother named Jeremy. She's enrolled in Saint Clare, a high school near here."

Rigsby knelt by the woman's head, "Looks like she died from blunt force trauma to the head."

Cho circled the body, "She could have gotten that from her head striking a rock or coral."

"Or from some_one _striking her."

Out of the corner of his eye Shawn watched as Jane frowned, looked up and down the beach, and started to walk off. He elbowed Gus.

"Ow, Shawn!"

"Shh, look."

Shawn slowly shifted until he was standing beside Lassiter, and tugged at his sleeve. "Hey Lassie, we should follow him."

Lassiter sighed, "While we sometimes use your…unique skills, we can't just pick up and go somewhere without evidence supporting it. You know that Shawn."

Shawn frowned and moved to stand next to Gus, "Hey, we should follow him."

"No, Shawn."

"Come on!"

"_No_, Shawn!"

"Why not?"

"Oh I don't know, because there's a killer on the loose and I don't want to spend a night on the cold beach waiting for him to find _me_."

Shawn nodded, "Good reason, but on the other hand, we'd be hanging out with Patrick."

"Yeah, I really don't think he'd like that."

"What makes you say that?"

"He hasn't seemed that thrilled to be around us so far."

"That's just because he doesn't know us yet."

Gus sighed, "Okay, even if we got to get to know him that still doesn't change the fact that the beach gets cold at night and you _know_ I don't sleep well without a blanket."

"We probably wouldn't be sleeping."

"Why do you say that?"

"I just don't think he sleeps very much."

"What are you –"

Their attention was drawn back to the agents around the body.

"Okay, I think we've gotten everything we can from the body. What do you think Jane? Jane?"

The agents looked around, before spotting the grey clad figure moving up the beach.

Lisbon pulled out her phone and called him.

"Hello?"

"Jane, where are you going?"

"Oh, for a walk."

"Jane."

"Really Lisbon, you don't want to know, not yet."

"Alright, but we're leaving."

"Bye!"

Sighing Lisbon hung up. "Alright, let's go talk to the family."

Rigsby nodded towards Jane, "What are we doing about him?"

"Jane's a big boy, he can take care of himself."

Shawn noticed Cho frown slightly and with a parting glance at Jane followed Rigsby back to their car.

The trip to the parents' house was long and quiet without Jane's constant joking, and the mood in the car was significantly darker. As they drove Shawn turned to Lassiter, and grabbed his hand. Lassiter looked at his hand and then looked at Shawn, eyebrow raised in question. Shawn cast a quick look at the other passengers and mouthed, _Ask them._

Lassiter tilted his head.

_Ask them about__** Jane**_.

Lassiter rolled his eyes and tugged his hand back. He crossed his arms and looked out the window.

Shawn's disappointment didn't last long. Soon they were pulling up to a modest house.

They moved confidently to the door and knocked. A crying woman in black answered.

Lisbon smiled and spoke softly, "Miss Robinson?"

"Yes?"

"Hello Miss Robinson, I'm Agent Lisbon, these are agents Rigsby and Cho, and officers Lassiter and O'Hara. We'd like to ask you a few questions about your daughter."

The woman nodded, and moved to open the door wider, Shawn noticed pictures on the mantel and awards on a nearby table, "Anything to help catch her killer." She paused, "Who are you two?"

Shawn gestured to himself and then Gus, "I'm Shawn Spencer, this is Bruce Lee, and we're with a psychic agency."

Gus glared at Shawn.

"Why are their psychics on my daughters case?"

"We're just helping the police with their investigation."

"I don't understand, what can a psychic do to help?"

Shawn smiled charmingly, "We can do a lot."

He put a hand to his head, "Oh! I'm getting something! Ah! Blue Crush!"

"What?"

"I'm out on the ocean surrounded by waves, but I'm not getting wet!"

Gus looked contemplatively at Shawn, "She was a surfer?"

Miss Robinson blinked, "Uh, yes, yes she was."

Shawn twitched, his eyes squeezed shut, "I see a montage! Rocky! Tigers with… burning eyes!"

"Oh, but not just a surfer, she won contests; she was very good, and …an extremely strong swimmer."

"That's amazing! You're both psychic?"

Shawn lowered his hands, "No, I have the visions but they're a bit garbled and hard to understand. Bruce Lee here interoperates them."

The woman nodded, stepping back to let them in, "That's wonderful, please come in. Thank you for helping to find my daughters killer."

As they walked through Miss Robinson's house Lisbon saw a picture of the family hanging above the fire place. "If you don't mind me asking, where are your husband and your son?"

Miss Robinson dabbed at her eyes as she sat down on a couch in the living room, "My husband is on a weeklong fishing trip with his friends, I tried calling but I guess he's out of cell range. I don't know where my son is; probably trying to cope by playing with his friends. Keep busy, you know?"

Cho sat directly across from the woman, Rigsby and Lisbon on either side. Lassiter and O'Hara stood behind them, as Shawn and Gus discreetly looked around the room for clues. Cho leaned forward, "We're sorry for your loss. How are _you_ keeping busy?"

Miss Robinson laughed, "I must have cleaned this house five times by now. I'm running out of cleaners."

"Is there anyone who would want to hurt your daughter?"

"N-no, no, everyone loved her."

"Does she have a boyfriend?"

"She's friends with some boys, but I don't think she's _seeing_ anyone. Her brother would probably know, they're very close."

"Her brother?"

"Yes."

"Jeremy, right?"

"Yes."

"Does he surf as well?"

"Yes he does."

Cho looked at Lisbon. She nodded.

"Thank you for your time. We'll be in contact if we have any more questions."

Miss Robinson nodded, and walked them to the door.

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Jane walked across the beach towards an outcropping of rocks. It was a beautiful day. Humming to himself he shrugged off his jacket and causally rolled up his sleeves. Wind blew across the ocean and ruffled his hair. He smiled.

He had an idea about what was going to happen. There was going to be a cave in this outcropping. It was going to be full of cave drawings, smooth sand decorated with sneaker tracks, and empty soda bottles. He was going to wait there and when the sun went down someone was going to show up. Probably multiple someones. He hadn't decided if they were the killers yet, that was why he hadn't told Lisbon his theory. Better that they check and see if the family was guilty while he waited.

Soon he made it to the rocks. A quick scan revealed the location of a cave. Jane grinned, it was gratifying to be right. He carefully climbed the slight slope up to the mouth of the cave. It was surrounded by scruffy bushes that partially hid the entrance; the perfect place for kids to hide. Inside the cave, just as he'd assumed, were empty cans, some beer bottles and chalk marks decorating the walls. Close to the mouth of the cave was a large black spot filled with ash from where a fire had been placed. Logs surrounded it that had been worn smooth by frequent use.

Jane sat on a log, watching the clouds move across the sky. It was very relaxing. It gave him time to think about the officers they were working with, well more specifically, the psychic they were working with. He'd been a bit hard on the kid, Cho was right, he shouldn't have done that. Oh well. He'd fix it later.

He went to the mouth of the cave and grabbed a stick; he started to draw pictures in the dirt. After a few hours the sun started to go down. Jane moved to the back of the cave.

Two hours after sunset another person entered the cave, moonlight reveling the person to be male, about 5'5". He leaned a surf board against the wall and set down a plastic bag. He sat on a log. A few minutes later two more entered the cave, they carried bags but neither had a surf board.

"Do you guys have everything?" Asked person one.

"Yeah, I think so." Said person two.

"Are you sure we should do this?" Asked person three.

"We already talked about this." Said person two.

"Besides, it's not like we're doing anything wrong. It's just a – a tribute." Said person one.

"But people always get mad when you play with fire." Said person three.

"We're surrounded by an ocean of water, I'm sure it'll be fine." Said person two.

Person one left the cave and came back with an armful of wood, and built a fire. Once the cave was full of light, the three saw Jane. They jumped and took an involuntary step back.

Jane put up his hands placating, "Whoa whoa whoa, I'm with the CBI, I'm here to help."

"Help? Help with what?"

"Help find your friends killer."


End file.
